I would say I've always been interested in self development, and until I had Hailey, I really was only dipping a toe in. Reading a book here, taking a class there, dabbling in mediations. Once I had Hailey, I knew I needed to actually break cycles and go a layer deeper. Becoming a mother, demanded so much more of my wholeness, of my feminine, of my well being - and I felt like I was starting from zero  with no clue where to start, in a toxic relationship, debt, and lacking community // support - it wasn't terrible, and it just wasn't the life I had envisioned for me or my daughter. And I felt like it just happened so fast. The reality is that it was happening without intention.  

Through my healing journey, I realized how I had been suppressing the care for parts of myself, for my trauma, for my feminine biological needs.  And how common  my story is for most women, feeling victim, feeling powerless,  going against the tides trying to "fit in" to patriarchal ideals and systems.

I realized if I want to reshape these systems for her - I had to do so for me. To love her unconditionally, I had to unlearn // decondition and relearn how to love myself unconditionally. To model a matriarchal system - I have to cultivate healthy relationship with the masculine and feminine, I'd have to create systems in my life that honor my feminine design and flow. 

Her birth became the catalyst to my maturation, to cleaning up the shadows, and becoming a master of tending to my own wholeness and living in authentic alignment with my design, and moving through this world grounded in my inner authority.